6 months!!

WOW!!!!  I can’t believe it’s been six months since I had Damian removed.  He is gone – hopefully forever.  The week before my anniversary I learned, again, the hard lesson that it is not always forever as a Facebook friend found out hers is back.

As I was preparing to write this blog I was thinking about what to put in and leave out and this appeared in my inbox.  I thought it was a great place to start:

Psalm 39:7 (NLT)
And so, Lord, where do I put my hope? My only hope is in you.

My hope has been in Him through all of this.  Through the  good and bad; through the pain; the stress; the confusion; all of the bumps; all of the joys; all of the hugs; all of the loss; all of everything!

I guess I should tell you where I am at:  my left side is still very weak; my hand has lost function and stays frequently in a fist; I still have drop foot and have to wear a brace to walk; daily headaches; lots of confusion; spacing out (told this is not seizures); TIA events; loss of balance; sensitivity to sound and extremely dizzy.

Now I have options- some days my favorite is to sit down and gripe about everything.  I do mean EVERYTHING!  You can imagine how much this helps; you got it, NOT one bit!  If anything it just stresses me out that much more.  This is a better option:

Psalm 98:4 (NLT)
Shout to the Lord, all the earth; break out in praise and sing for joy!

I have to remind myself sometimes to do this, but I think that is better than forgetting altogether.  I could get mad and say I’m going to walk away from God and do this on my own.  I could blame Him if I wanted.  But why - what did He do wrong?  He has shown me mercy, because it could be worse!!

Psalm 116:5 (NLT)
How kind the Lord is! How good He is! So merciful, this God of ours!

I want to be healthy again!  I want to sound like a southern girl again!  I want to crochet again!  I want to raise my left arm up shoulder height and then over my head!  I want to walk without a brace!  I am determined to walk a 5k in six more months! 

Where do you want to be in 6 months?  Do you want to be doing the exact same thing?  Do you want to start a new hobby?  Do you want to read that new book?  Do you want to lose weight?

What’s stopping you?  I have found many reasons to not do something.  I've even said I’m too busy to read a book – now that’s funny!  Let’s all band together to support – motivate – encourage – pray for one another.  

Job

I was scrolling through FB today and somebody wrote about Job and how he served God in the worst time of his life just like he did during the best.  That just really got me thinking . . . I wish I were more like Job!!

I am going through one of my toughest journeys in life, but I am not alone.

Deuteronomy 31:8 New King James Version (NKJV)

And the Lord, He is the One who goes before you. He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you; do not fear nor be dismayed.” 

Through this journey I have met some awesome people.  Lisanne gives me hope, Donna gives me courage, Dad gives me love, Mike gives me strength, Sierra and Cheyenne give me friendship, and Crystal reminds me God is with me.  The list goes on, but I can’t list them all. 

God tested Job in so many ways – he lost everything – his family, his wealth and his health, BUT he stayed faithful to God.  Job did not curse Him, he worshiped Him.  Job did not turn his back on Him, he prayed to Him.  Job knew God was there with him and did not abandon him. 

I hope to be that faithful!!  I hope to stop getting angry and yelling and instead praise God for my health!  I hope to stop complaining and pray for my blessings!  I hope to stop being so self centered and lift up others to God!  I hope to be a better listener; listening to God and my friends.  

We will all go through hard times in life, but we get to choose how we will respond.  I have chosen very poorly at times!!  Instead of crumbling, getting angry at everything around us we could focus on the good things – people who love us, the beauty around us, laughter, and God!!